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Ronnie Jackson:"Beautiful day isn't it. Well, maybe it isn't so beautiful. It is day though."

Ronnie Jackson:"Easy cuddles! One move and you're a dead midget!"

Ronnie Jackson:"Nutty as a fruitcake, and with all that beautiful frosting."

Willie:"You gotta be neat ya know!"

Ronnie Jackson:"You see I wanted to be a detective too. It only took brains, courage, and a gun. And I had the gun."

Cop:"Keep moving! You got a long drive back to town!"
Ronnie Jackson:"Yeah well let me tell you something!"
Cop:"What?!"
Ronnie Jackson:"I like long drives."

Ronnie Jackson:"You can open the mailman later."

Cop:"If you bother us again, I'll personally punch you in the nose so hard it will look like other people's noses."

Carlotta Montay:"He said he was safe."
Ronnie Jackson:"Oh he's safe alright. I mean he's safe alright."
Carlotta Montay:"But he's not safe! I know he isn't!"
Ronnie Jackson:"No, no, he's in a terrible spot."
Carlotta Montay:"But I feel he's in great danger."
Ronnie Jackson:"Yes, yes. He's in great danger. Yeah but he's safe alright. He's safe. I sound like an umpire."

Ronnie Jackson:"Oh oh, her's schizo's about to frania."

Ronnie Jackson:"You come one step closer and I'll break this record into a thousand pieces! Oh, wait a minute who's side am I on?!"

Ronnie Jackson:"Everything you touch turns to Rigor mortis."