Don Pedro:"If we can do this, Cupid is no longer an archer, his glory shall be ours! For we are the only love gods!"
Don Pedro:"This learned constable is too cunning to be understood."
Neighbor:"Your like an answer to our prayers!"
Coach Boone:"No, wait a minute. I'm not an answer to your prayers. I'm not a savior, or a Jesus Christ, Martin Luther King, or the Easter bunny. I'm a football coach, that's all. Just a football coach."
Neighbor:"You're our coach!"
Coach Boone:"Listen up! I don't care if your black, green, blue, white, or orange! I want all of my defensive players on this side, and all players going out for offense over here! Right now!"
Coach Yoast:"This isn't about me. I'm worried about my boys."
Coach Boone:"Well I ain't gonna cook'em and eat'em."
Coach Boone:"Think you have a future in football?"
Louie Lastik:"Heck no! I just figure if I gotta to be in school I might as well hit some people while I'm at it."
Coach Boone:"This is no democracy! It is a dictatorship! I am the law! If you survive camp, you will be on the team, if you survive."
Coach Boone:"What's the matter?"
Louie Lastik:"I'm eligible."
Coach Boone:"Well I'm glad to hear that son, but I'm already married."
Coach Boone:"We will be perfect in every aspect of the game. You drop a pass, you run a mile. You miss a blocking assignment, you run a mile. You fumble the football, and I will break my foot off in your john brown hind parts, and then you will run a mile."
Coach Boone:"What did you say?!"
Blue Stanton:"I need a water break."
Coach Boone:"You need a water break? Water is for cowards. Water makes you weak. Water is for washing blood of that uniform, and you don't get no blood on my uniform. Boy you must be outside your mind!"
Coach Boone:"I want you to tell me something about one of your black teammates."
Louie Lastik:"Sir yes sir! I'm rooming with Blue sir! And I've noticed he wears those spotted underwear, bikini style sir!"
Coach Boone:"Ok, maybe somebody who's not your roommate."
Coach Boone:"This is where they fought the battle of Gettysburg. Fifty thousand men died right here on this field, fighting the same fight that we are still fighting among ourselves today. This green field right here, painted red, bubbling with the blood of young boys. Smoke and hot lead pouring right through their bodies. Listen to their souls, men. 'I killed my brother with malice in my heart. Hatred destroyed my family.' You listen, and you take a lesson from the dead. If we don't come together right now on this hallowed ground, we too will be destroyed, just like they were. I don't care if you like each other or not, but you will respect each other. And maybe, I don't know, maybe we'll learn to play this game like men."
Eli:"Put that hand on me again, you won't get it back."
Eli:"Cursed be the ground for our sake. Both thorns and thistles it shall bring forth for us. For out of the ground we were taken, for the dust we are and to the dust we shall return."
Solara:"Well, how do you know that you're walking in the right direction?"
Eli:"I walk by faith, not by sight."
Solara:"What does that mean?"
Eli:"It means that you know something even if you don't know something."
Solara:"That doesn't make any sense."
Eli:"It doesn't have to make sense. It's faith, it's faith. It's the flower of light in the field of darkness that's giving me the strength to carry on. You understand?"
Solara:"Is that from your book?"
Eli:"No, it's, uh, Johnny Cash, Live at Folsom Prison."
Carnegie:"God is good is He not?"
Eli:"All the time."
Carnegie:"Not all the time."
Solara:"Hey! You know that voice you heard? Did it say anything about this?"
Eli:"We'll get out alive, both us."
George:"What about us?"
Eli:"Didn't mention you."
Eli:"The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. He makes me to lie down in green pastures. He leads me beside the still waters. He restores my soul. He leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for His name's sake. Yea' though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil for Thou art with me."
Eli:"I fought the good fight, I finished the race, I kept the faith."
Hijacker:"What are you standing around for?! Kiss him!"
Chainsaw Hijacker:"What did he say?"
Eli:"He's in shock. I think he meant 'kill him'."
Det. Alonzo Harris:"I'm thirsty. I want a beer. What about you? You want a beer?"
Det. Alonzo Harris:"You gotta decide whether you're a wolf or a sheep."
Det. Alonzo Harris:"Open your eyes man, you'll feel a lot better."
Jake Hoyt:"That's not funny. That's not funny."
Det. Alonzo Harris:"Whatcha laughing for if it ain't funny?"
Jake Hoyt:"I don't know man."
Det. Alonzo Harris:"All that jelly and no toast."
Det. Alonzo Harris:"May I read my paper?"
Jake Hoyt:"I'm sorry, sir."
Det. Alonzo Harris:"Thank you."
Det. Alonzo Harris:"You know what the gas chamber smells like? Pine oil. That's where you're headed boy, to a pine oil heaven. I'm gonna get that gun then I'm gonna get that money. I don't believe you got it in you, Jake. I'm gonna go get it right now."
Det. Alonzo Harris:"It's not what you know, it's what you can prove."
Det. Alonzo Harris:"To protect the sheep, you gotta catch the wolf. And it takes a wolf to catch a wolf, you understand?"
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